2016. The Tipping Point.


It is difficult to sum up what has certainly been a colorful year.

In a year plagued with tumultuous changes all over the world, and rarely for the better, we have seen escalation in war and hate crimes, racism and outright bigotry.

We have seen momentous changes in the political landscape with US electing Donald Trump and Euro grappling to maintain control with the break-off of UK.

Meanwhile the war in Syria rages, and war has penetrated the street of Philippines, Germany and a host of other nations.

And to top it off, 2016 has again been recorded as one of top ten hottest year on records. So yes, the global warming is real.

If there is anything we can learn from 2016, is that I believe the world is truly on a tipping point. If we do not change how we think, how we act, and how we lead our lives, these changes could become irreversible.

And as always change begin with oneself, reflect on your achievements, on your blessing, however small they may be, reflect on your mistake, and forgive your opponents, whose political views you do not share.

Be kinder to people, be mindful of our footprints on Earth, and strive to be more tolerant to people who are not like yourselves.

In the spirit of this Christmas, and at the end of the year, I still have hope that humanity have always found a way to get out of difficult situation, and hopefully 2017 isn’t as terrible as this one.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year everyone!

With much faith, hope and love,




2015 – The Year in Review

I can scarcely believe the speed of time when you get older. I began this year returning to the city where people habitually throw the proverbial dice, Jakarta.


And this time i came more than prepared, job in hand – check, community forged – check, place to live – check, projects to do and mission to accomplish.

In addition, my parents has generously given me their car for me to use to travel around Jakarta’s notoriously bad (and dangerous) traffic.


The CSM gang

So with that i set off my sights on fortune.

Things went quite well for the first three months or so, my social calendar was filled, my job was where I fit in, analytic and business development.

Then like most things, stuff did not turn out as smoothly as i expected. The place i worked for started moving me around to the next stage in the sales pipeline, from analytic to marketing, and then to sales, then eventually to customer service and battling fires whenever there were one. Throughout all these my compensation did not change one bit, but my roles has been significantly widened to terms that were not in the initial contract. Nevertheless, i soldiered on and climbed a mountain on the side.


Meanwhile, in my personal life, finally things took a turn for the better and I met the girl whom i feel i have a very good connection with. I have lots of hope for the future, and we started our relationship around mid-year.

I wished i have the dual fortune to succeed straight away in work and relationship in the same year, as that would have been great, but the customer service work was too much for me to take, i did not take this job so i could babysit nagging customers for fault that isn’t mine, and as well as collecting late payments from troublesome customers.

Meanwhile, a deal that i was offered last year verbally (but not written) didn’t materialize and for me this was the last straw. I mulled over one and half months before finally deciding it is time for me to resign. I had initially loved the job, but clearly looking at the company stuff turnover was not encouraging, and neither is being somewhat cheated on.

And now in November, i am back again in square one of career, figuring things out from the beginning again. It would probably require a compelling offer from reputable companies to get me to work for someone else again.

Pushed into a corner, with not a lot of money to burn, and a relationship that i will fight to the end to keep, i chose to consolidate my capital and restart anew. The positive thing i got from all this ordeal is that i’m lucky that i made these kind of mistakes and learnt these kind of things (including being featured in a major newspaper) when i’m still at the age of 27. Had i been older, the cost would have been significantly higher. Well, this is Jakarta anyway. Survival of the fittest here.

In between my resignation and the resumption of my search for a business to do, i had the fortune to travel with some of my old friends to Taiwan, and it was good. Dined, traveled till our legs could carry us no more, and chat till the wee hours.


Super awesome roasted pepper bun (I ate four in two days!!)


Yeh, it was a good break from a tough life.

But now its time to begin again. I hoped the preparations for 2016 will be well underway when the year turned. It could turn out well, it could turn out not so well, but either way, 2016 is here, and i have to be ready.

I hope God will give me wisdom for me decide which path i should take, it has been a long way from home.

Goodbye 2015, it has been good knowing you

With much faith, hope and love



What Great Men says about Relationship

I recently read an article about Talulah Riley, the wife of SpaceX CEO, Elon Musk about what it takes to achieve greatness and they are obsessed about something. And i came to wonder if most entrepreneurs put aside their wife in their quest of stardom.

But from a few of the heroes i admired, i find comforting quotes in their memoirs and biographies.

From Warren Buffet, about his wife Susie,

“Susie has been the sun and rain in my garden for 25 years.”

And yet when Susie eventually does die, Buffett can’t cope. As his daughter, also named Susie, is planning the funeral, she tells him he doesn’t have to attend. “Warren was overcome with relief,” Schroeder writes. ” ‘I can’t,’ he said. To sit there, overwhelmed with thoughts of Susie, in front of everyone, was too much. ‘I can’t go.’ ”

There are some challenges even the world’s greatest investor can’t handle.

From Lee Kuan Yew, about his wife Choo,

“Without her, I would be a different man, with a different life. She devoted herself to me and our children. She was always there when I needed her.

“She has lived a life full of warmth and meaning. I should find solace in her 89 years of life well lived. But at this moment of the final parting, my heart is heavy with sorrow and grief.”

I am a firm believer that behind every great man is a great woman, and these two heroes, have clearly shown that they too can maintain a great relationship while building a country from scratch (literally). Who else would have the priviledge to say that.

Seeking Myself


After watching the really great film Winter Sleep, i somehow imagine myself in the shoes of Mr. Aydin, former theater actor of 25 years, who now own a small hotel in Anatolia, Turkey.

Though having the appearance of an old man, inside, he was still struggling to deal with settling back into his apparently much lesser life. His constant struggle to find new things to do, a sister who herself lived through a divorce and a young wife, idealistic but naive.

I reflected at myself, long after the credits roll were finished, that I at some points are seeking the remnants of my former glory. Although I am only 27, I knew and remembered I once had it all. I was doing very well at uni, i was well-respected by both teachers and fellow students alike, I had a girlfriend once, and I was living in Melbourne, the city that until now i still misses.

It is truly one of life great mysteries, how wheel of life keep turning, once you are on top, now you are at the bottom, struggling to make your way up to the top again.

Beyond that, I longed for a partner, who would understand me, and connect with me on a level i have not had since, and due to a mix of semi-permanent stubborness, and a foolish desire for the occasional rare comets, i am still a single. Drifting in and out of social events soon grew tiring.

May God and I, have mercy on myself. Give yourself a chance man. You can do better than sitting on a balcony watching the moon came in and out behind the cover of cloudy skies and darkness. Find yourself a girl who will sit with you, who will offer her lap for you to rest your weary head and heavy shoulders.

From Me to Myself


My 27th Birthday Surprise!

Its been a really long time since i last had a birthday surprise with this many friends, and its been a while too since i felt good about where my life is.

For the past three or so years i struggled to settle down into a life in Indonesia. Though I knew a lot of people, i have not really found friends where i could feel i could connect. I was missing it so badly from my former friends in Melbourne and Singapore.

27th Birthday Surprise!

The first three months of 2015 seems to have passed by in a whirlwind of adventures, emotions and memories with you guys from CSM (you know who you are!).

I am really thankful to have found you guys, for the companion, the support, the conversation, and the adventures we took together.

Though i dont know how long will we have each other backs, I will enjoy this moment.

Thanks for the birthday surprise and the cakes guys! Much appreciated.

With much faith, hope and love


2014 – Year in Review

Cant believe its been 9 years since i first wrote my end of year review, and this year i am going to write a pictorial one.

In 2014 I attended a close friend wedding

Josherm Wedding

Involved in building a bunch of stuff

Kubota New Factory

Have a feel of how tough it is to be a property lessor

Pearl Garden

Learnt how to be a property surveyor and going to far away places in search of a good one


Finally visited my old home Melbourne and met some long lost friends. Attended a beautiful engagement party

James and Angela

Witnessing my own’s sister engagement


And capping the year with a break in Macau and Hong Kong



Although at times i felt that this year my career has not progressed much, looking back at these pictures i am glad to have an eventful year.

Hopefully, in 2015, i will be able to report some long overdue work achievements.

Until then cheers!


The Lone Wanderer

Door to Everwyhere


The Twenties. The years you spend wandering through the desert of your mind, searching for a place to anchor your next stage of life.

The early twenties was like the YOLO years. I studied, i gamed, i aced exams, i go on dates and i had my buddies who were always behind me. My friends was plentiful and they were not difficult to meet-up with. They know me well, and i could just rock up and not have anything expected of me. I had it all.

But the late twenties saw my life gradually transformed beyond my control. People grew up, they start working, they start getting engaged, and then married. Some have already started raising their kids. Things seems to move so fast once you are out of uni. And the less evolved people like me stay behind in this mythical desert, seemingly alone, alone in the crowd.

And this really made me wish i had Doraemon’s door to everywhere. For all the advances technology has made in aviation and long distance teleconferencing, nothing beats meeting out your friends in person. And it is difficult to meet all of the friends i miss because financially i couldn’t go where ever all my friends are.

Singapore, Malaysia, Melbourne, Hong Kong, China, New York, Sweden, Germany, South Africa. So many countries, so little cash.

Words cant express how much i miss my uni years and how much i wish i can meet my old friends as often as I used to.

Life’s journey is difficult, and I have never felt more like a lone wanderer than I do now.

I miss all of you.



The Hard Truth

“A guy came up to me at the gym and asked me what event I was training so hard for. Life, motherfucker” From @GSElevator Tweet.

Life. This thing that we all have to go through everyday is sometime so tiring you felt like you are suffocated.

I am probably a very fine example of somebody who has it relatively easy in the growing up years and then find the years after education unbelievably difficult.
I am not used to losing badly, i lose to some, and that was when the playground was quite even.

Life doesnt give you easy shit like that. It gives you unfair competitors, bitch customers, as well as shoddy bureaucrats who attempt to fleece you for as many bucks as they can. This is the real world. Suck it up and move on or so they said.

When in uni, you can create stellar business plan and so and so, but jumping into the real world you suddenly find everyone else can too, and then u slug it out to death. Its a never-ending chess game. This is where i guess ambition start to eat into you as you have an imagination in your head as how things will go and should go in the next 1, 5, 10 years, but the next week you find out that you have to redo your plan again because your competitor has cock-blocked your move and so on and on.

If i was playing a game, and somebody is blocking my move time after time after time, it would not take long for me to pull the plug. But this is life, i cant just pull the plug unless i want to die now. But seriously, it is fucking frustrating to have to stave off competition. Sometimes you really want to shout just get the fuck out of my way already.

I can understand why people who have decided to join the rat race find it difficult to quit even though by new-entrants judgment, they seem to have done well for themselves. Well the answer i think is relatively straightforward, people, especially ambitious ones, can never really rest until they are head and shoulders above the competition and no threats in the near future. Things however, are never like that in the business world. Your competitor gets bigger as grow bigger. Your seemingly increasing ammunition is also matched by theirs and what you end up with is a never-ending battle, a strategic one, and it creeps into your life, even to your dream. You go sleep at night everyday thinking how should i get rid of this guy, knowing your competitor is probably thinking of the same thing at night.

Seriously, if i could smash my keyboard now i probably would. WHY is life incredibly frustrating. You can never see a clear light at the end of the tunnel for even one day. There is always some hand messing with the light, like some minion who keeps putting things to hinder you.

Just fuck off already.



We Got Married…and Relationship

wgm adam couple

Recently my sister came back for her university vacation bringing me tons ( or GBs) full of fresh goodies to watch and amongst them was this show called we got married. Some of you might know just by looking at the picture above, of the Adam couple and instantly have a reminisce the feeling when watching them together on the show.

I am fully aware that it is a reality show and a virtual couple, but i would assume that something else was happening, where the lines between virtual and reality somehow become blurred and they were sort of feeling like the actor in the Avatar movie.

For somebody like myself who have loved and lost, it is truly endearing and refreshing to see a couple who just only begins their first relationship. It was so fresh, so new, everything was like achieving a significant milestones and I am reminded that I was once like that too. I was once a young man learning the ropes of a relationship, learning more about the other person and being accomodating. Relationship is definitely not an easy thing to do, it gives you a myriad of unexplainable feeling. Sometimes you feel so happy that everything you do turns out absolutely perfect. But at other times, it leaves you wondering why do you even bother with one at all.

There was a point in time where i felt dismayed and discouraged after a failed relationship that i wonder when would i be able to open my heart again, to try again. Its a feeling i dread just thinking about, the prospect of having another broken heart. It has been close to two year now since my last relationship and i am still sitting on the sidelines watching friends after friends getting married and starting a new family of their own. It doesn’t particularly bother me that they did, its just some people have already found their other half and I have not.

It was only when I start watching this show again recently that I felt a sense of joy i haven’t felt in a long time, the feeling of making somebody else so happy it brought tears down their cheek. The feeling of being dependable for somebody else to rely on, and doing the things you would never do on your own. Its a crazy world, relationship. And although i still have fear about approaching a new relationship, i think i am encouraged and reminded of just how much joy it can bring and that is what i shall kept in my mind for this new year.

I hope out there that God above would help me find my final missing puzzle.


with much faith, hope and love



Twenty-thirteen Year in Review

Dieng MistEntering 2013 was not unlike entering the surreal gate to a geothermal plant above. It was dense with mist, and visibility was low. I wasn’t certain what i was about to find, or whether the things i was looking for was all that important, but as the clock ticks past midnight on December 31st, 2012, i knew i had to move forward anyway.

In 2013, i spent a substantial amount of time trying to build a new property development company on the back of rising boom in residential needs. My starting place in Jakarta couldn’t have been tougher. There were so many arcane and magical rules that you need to be careful not to trip or else there will be quite an economic catastrophe to bear. Even though a major part of my master degree was about entrepreneurship, nothing quite prepared me for the real challenge in building up a company from scratch. It was painful, it was difficult and it was wholly uncertain. It is certainly not for everybody, especially people with no alternative income source at that time.

Nevertheless, even the search for the one piece of land remain fruitless till year end, i have learnt a great deal about property and construction in this one year, a skill that i knew would be worth much more later on in life.

Fortunately although the property business was at best fledgling, our other two businesses was doing okay, demand was not as poor as all the gloomy news reported and this was a very welcomed news. In terms of financial goals, although i didnt meet my own goal, as a family, we have met and exceeded our productive investment target so i was more or less able to console myself about my lackluster performance.

In terms of social life, i spent half the time mostly by myself doing my own things, and discovering what is it that i really want to do in life seeing as I am not getting any younger. My time of wanton experimenting is probably soon to be over, and i need to focus my energy more on the things that will have a longer term effect.

My facebook wall is constantly bombarded by pictures of marriages, babies and kids in wonderful setting, although some of them does look extravagant. Sometimes when i happen to browse on these amazing pictures of my friends that have gotten married, i do harbor a sense of envy. But then again, i knew i had a lot of homework on myself to do, and i am probably not ready to marry at this age yet.

Relationship is a difficult, fickle thing and as mostly pragmatic person i sometimes find living the single life where i could do what i want, when i want it to be the easiest solution. Nonetheless, that doesn’t mean that i dont want to marry, i just feel that it will take a special kind of person to be able to live with me. I guess that will be the final piece of the puzzle i needed to find, where ever that person might be.

The relative high point of this year was spending time with family again, and enjoying the life in this small city where I came from. There aren’t much entertainment around, or cafe that i can hang out in, but then when you work monday to saturday, that kind of things doesn’t bother you that much anymore. Hanging out with people with lower socioeconomic capability also makes me appreciate the life that i have had. I am glad i dont have to budget in-between salary, I am glad I do not worry about having mortgages for life, and I am glad mostly because i can eat pretty much whatever i want and not worry about the bills. It is the kind of things that I have often ignored in my more priviledged life as an international student in Australia.

And comparing 2013 to 2012 was like comparing the very bottom of the mariana trench with somewhere around sea level. There wasn’t any great breakthrough, nor a sudden windfall or girl in my lap, but nonetheless having a relatively stable, steady year after the total calamity of 2012 was an extremely fortunate gift from above. I got to sang christmas songs in church with a lighthearted heart, knowing that my burden from 2012 has somewhat lifted and i can step forward into 2014 with relative confidence of greater things ahead.

With much faith, hope and love





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