It has been a while since i last have anything to write regarding matter of heart, but this is just a short rant about what i understand about myself.
Since my last experience, i have become someone who is rather pessismistic about the prospect of love. I kept saying to people that it is often hard work, and hard work that you dont know whether it will pay off in the future or not. It is like going against the insurmountable odds to chase something that sometimes you have very little hope of achieving. It almost borders on stupidity.
But i suppose it doesn’t take long at all to notice why people reacts in such a way. Much like a flower cant choose where it blooms, infatuation or the deadly sister, love, cant choose when it will blossom. People are generally rational human beings when it comes to almost everything in life. That is why the economic theories are correct most of the time, because people are expected to react in a certain way. Except of course, when it comes to matter of heart.
Trying to explain why I turn stupid, is like trying to explain how the earth comes about, or the chicken and egg question. I just don’t know.
I’m rather certain my newfound infatuation, is all but unattainable. Slightly above my league and unavailable no less.
I can only hope that someday i would find the right person, but i despair if i will ever find one at all back home.
Like the title of this entry, there is so many fish in the sea, but out of all the fish in the ocean, there is only one for you, and you have to use the right bait.